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  • [redacted]
    replied
    Well, I'm an artist (though I have mixed feelings with it these days) in part because of feeling enamored with certain aesthetics/sensory archetypes. A way of trying to possess beauty I suppose, as I can draw anything... as long as I can figure out how.

    I tend to enjoy the sensory world in general, but trying to talk about it feels annoying. Like when someone goes on about the "beauty of nature" it makes me want to throw up on them because it sounds so wanky and dumb, but... well. The urge to throw up is fairly sensuous in its own way. =P

    But yeah, some things are so beautiful it gives me a boner in my usually desolate soul. I don't know how to explain it better than that.

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  • ledyanoy
    replied
    Sound and my Si dominance.

    Accordance with universal or divine design (which I equate with underlying truth) vs. Discordance is uppermost in how I orient in the world. This includes all of my sensory perceptions, but for now I am going to attempt probably clumsily to put into words, how sound is so important to me.

    I think I would rather go blind than deaf, if I was actually given the choice in a black magic world between losing one or the other and that’s not because I don’t value my sight. I am extremely visual, and like most humans rely primarily (too much at the loss of other senses, in some cases) on my sight. It’s that to me, sight as a sense is so much less nuanced, even at it’s best. It’s also deceiving. What it gives in pure beauty pleasure, it lacks in so many ways as per own capabilities - depth, detail, breadth.

    Sound is what we need. As much as I crave like a lunatic sometimes, pure silence. I don’t really want complete silence. I just hate noise, which is difference. I want the sound of breeze, water, even if it’s miles away or underground, birds or crickets. Something. Sound is intelligence to me. If you can’t hear, you are screwed and at the mercy of chaos.



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  • Mahat
    replied
    I'm inferior Se (well unconscious Se according to CT development levels), so I can either ignore or be extremely sensitive to sensory input. I don't really pay attention to my internal sensory experience so I can't really comment on that. But for the longest time, I've always been enamored with art, both aesthetically and symbolically. Aesthetics has always been a fascination of mine as it revs up my Ni with metaphysical and symbolic musings. Art and aesthetics are never without context and it's a joy to parse out the meanings of these things. With that, my experience of the sensory world is highly impressionistic, creating a simulacra-like experience of reality. I need Se to ground and give my impressions body and impact, and to experience a sense of flow with the world around me. Too much layering of direct experience creates a dissociative detachment from it, and reality becomes a ever more impressionistic and surreal simulacra. When I eventually get out of my fugue state, I can experience reality and direct sensory input as a bit of an uncanny yet welcome interruption from my normal flow. I can live in my mind while the whole world passes by. Somewhere else, I wrote about my relationship to Se:

    I view Se as a primordial life force that’s necessary to experience reality in it’s fullest form (as someone with inferior Se). A will to being. My experience of Se is heavily symbolic and impressionistic. A concrete example of this is my love of art and aesthetics. Where words end, art and aesthetics fill in the gap where words no longer suffice. Art and aesthetics are languages in and of itself with their own set of rules, codes, and signifers. Similar to verbal language, the language of aesthetics is dynamic and subject to frequent paradigm shifts but in even more rapid succession than verbal language. We metabolize images on both a conscious and subconscious level, and decoding those meanings has been an interest of mine.

    There was a period of time in my where my anger issues and depression have reached their zenith simultaneously, and it was during this time that I idolized and deified the rage that I carried. It gave me a sense of vitality, motivation, volition, and power that I’d otherwise never felt. Little did I realize at the time that it was an emergency attempt to access my Se, especially during a time where I felt psychologically, physically, emotionally inert, and mired in my own delusions, paranoia, grief, and repressed emotions.

    For me to access Se is to disrupt my normal mode of being which is to be disengage with the world and be internally focused, But that disruption of the normal flow of things is necessary in order to fully self-actualize.

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  • ledyanoy
    replied
    moonlight, I am only just getting a sense impression of you ? so I wouldn’t be so foolhardy as to jump into full range of what your cog type is. I was only wondering as per Si because that one does seem to be significant for you - it is for me, but it can be for people in varying ways (or cog position ranking).

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  • ledyanoy
    replied
    With sound, it seems that I notice when things are synchronous vs. asynchronous and the latter has a effect of feeling disturbing (distracting in a negative way and bothersome) to me. This relates to how I pick up on people’s voices. I have an excellent ear for people’s voice qualities, but along with this also a distinct like/dislike kind of reaction to factors of people’s voice. If someone’s way of speaking grates on me in any form, it colours my feelings about them as a person.

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  • ledyanoy
    replied
    So much sensory goodness! I am enjoying reading everyone’s posts, so much. ? I have to come back to share more myself, but just wanted to say Vive that loss of touch sensation is a symptom of MS. I know two people close to me who have MS and all I can say it must be horrible. When it progresses, there is malfunction in the communication from the skin receptors to the brain, so things like burning yourself becomes a risk as only one example.

    I love a love/hate kind of thing with sound/hearing. I am extra sensitive and prickly to sounds, which makes some sounds give superlative pleasure in many ways and others extremely horrible and up to rage inducing. One sound that I like in almost any form is water - waves, rain, waterfalls, brooks, rapids, fountains, melting ice. The only exception I can think of is a dripping faucet.

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  • Vive
    replied
    Ahh, the senses, they are such a wonderful thing.

    I love coming close to the brink of overstimulation every so often. Exercising until total exhaustion, taking many crazy rollercoaster rides, parties with lots of people and mildly loud music, but enough space to dance or just move around in. I really dislike it when I am somewhere and there 10 people that are bumping up to me, because there isn't even more than a centimeter of wriggle space.

    Taste is essential to me. I love to eat and I love a great many types of food. However, I tend to eat fast and my mind is often somewhere else, so I must admit that I sometimes do miss out on properly tasting food. It's something I think I can live without, though. Although I do think I should be more mindful sometimes when eating as it can make a whole lot of difference for how things taste.

    I really wouldn't want to go without sound, though. I'm not a musician, but music and sound in general can affect me so much more than just visuals. Not to mention that is a great practical hindrance, like losing your vision. Strictly emotionally speaking, though my hearing is more important to me.

    Vision, though can also be unexpectly great. Sometimes, you look at a 'mundane' thing and you think 'mhh.. that's actually pretty neat'. Like standing in the park and looking up at the trees and the leaves and seeing the contrast and all the green and dark green and browns in contrast to a blue sky.

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    I was just wondering, what would it be like if you lose your sense of touch, can that even happen? I'm not even sure what that would be like. Blind, deaf, having no taste I can somehow imagine or picture, but not feeling pressure or heat, I don't think I can imagine that.

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  • Princess of Hearts
    replied
    Ooh, I realized I forgot to say the most basic things.

    In some ways I am not very sensitive at all, I can't get overwhelmed, I love large crowds even though I have social anxiety, noise, smells, strong flavors and spices, bright colors, lights, I am always wanting more stimulation, it's a lot easier for it to be 'not enough' than 'too much'.

    I also like rollercoasters, but in moderation, that is one thing I definitely have to be in the mood for and in the right company so I can focus on the experience and not on my body, my reaction to extreme rollercoasters and similar contraptions is most of the time 'No thank you'

    However I am also an insanely picky eater, but luckily it's getting a lot better with age, I am also squeamish about many things to the point of panic and I can be very fussy and particular.
    As a child I was very picky when it came to clothes and it was impossible to get me to wear things I found annoying, it's possible I'm still like that except I don't notice it because I choose my own clothes.
    I am very scared of pain, or expectation of pain more than pain itself and I often imagine it being a million times worse than it is in reality, I don't know how much my body can handle.
    I am so scared of pregnancy in the future and possible complications and I have a strong feeling that I'm definitely gonna be one of the less lucky ones, the pain itself would be fine, it is what it has to be, but I just fear my body malfunctioning.
    Overall very sensitive, often considered very dramatic for how sensitive I am, I would say I fit HSP but the thing about not getting overwhelmed throws me off.

    I looove food, but I would love to not love it even more, I think that for me it's often a cheap and unhealthy substitute for other things, I don't think anything would be legitimately missing from my life if I was not able to enjoy food. There are many things I could enjoy even more so in that sense I don't see food as truly important to me like it might be for some people, but it would surely be very disorienting to lose my sense of taste. Perhaps I take it for granted because it's so easily accessible!

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  • SpiritoftheGael
    replied
    I can't imagine losing my smell or taste ledyanoy I love food so much. I'd say my sensory experiences are overall weird. I am verrry sensitive to some things and don't even notice other things at all. Like I might not notice bad smells around me for whatever reason, but when I met my boyfriend I automatically noticed how safe and wonderful he smelled. I think he is kinda bemused because I'll just bury my nose in him and be like you smell good even when he was just working and he's like what do I smell like? I have no clue lol. Unnameable. Smells like home I guess.

    I am really sensitive to textures too. When I was a child, like maybe 3 or 4, I remember there was one pair of socks I'd wear. They had a more silky feel. I said all of the other socks itched my feet. I'm not weird about socks anymore, but I do feel sensitive to pants. I really really hate wearing black jeans. I don't know why but every pair of black jeans I've ever owned have itched my legs. It must be the dye they use. Blue jeans never have the same effect.

    I also identified my own food allergies when I was like 3 or 4. I refused to eat eggs as a small child. My parents thought I was just picky, but then I had my allergies tested years later and I was allergic to eggs. I also cut out wheat on my own.

    I often get overwhelmed and feel drowned by too many sensations as well. When there's too much noise and light I can get really withdrawn and upset. But other times I don't even notice noise around me because I block it all out. It's very weird.

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  • Princess of Hearts
    replied
    Figured it out, the problem was that I didn't know where to click to get 'Upload Attachments'!
    I'm slowly getting a hang of how the site works


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    I'm obsessed with this sparkle effect. Obviously not real but this iscloser to reflecting my experience, if it was up to me this is what the world would look like
    I only wish people in the last one were doing something else


    These rooms give me?
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    I really love the type of home design with lots of ornate shapes, lavish textures and a romantic touch.
    I don't love all of the datails in the second one but I think when it comes to images I get attracted to gaudy side of things because it gets the feeling across better.


    I used to constantly look at online catalogues and imagining how I'd decorate if I could do it however I wanted, even how I wanted other people's homes to look



    ledyanoy no, I don't, I have some ideas but I would rather not share them just yet
    Do you have any impressions?
    ​ ​​

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  • ledyanoy
    replied
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    The frost has melted only days ago, and almost overnight the shoots are pushing through the still hard ground, bursting to open. Bare branches on trees hold shoots ready to go from tiny green dots to massive leaves. River and lake waters are flowing full, the sun is making itself known. It’s not quite full summer; more lazy and full bright hazy sweaty days are ahead. But, for now it’s only the beginning. Winter and clouds still loom overhead and the nights are cool. It’s time for reflection and also looking ahead. It’s a period of pure stillness of birth and also movement in the most vulnerable way.

    It’s time in it’s most radiant form and I want it to stop so I can soak it up, before it passes.





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  • ledyanoy
    replied


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  • ledyanoy
    replied
    Summer solstice is my most fave sensory connection “this is me” time. This includes the lead up time to it and also immediately afterward - late spring moving into summer and the start of summer. It’s when the sun is at it’s most potent and the longest sunlight hours, which makes sense in that I think I am a very Sun heavy person astrologically and elementally. Thematically, I think this seasonal time period represents the most hope. It’s also wedding season, interestingly.

    Sensory-wise, I will come back to. ?

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  • ledyanoy
    replied
    Ooooh love the Summer Wine song. It captures the full ripened height of the season so well. I also love summer. So many thing are arising from this, but will have to come back as I am in the middle of too many things going on and don’t multi-task well. I just wanted to say for now, how much I love your post moonlight.

    Out of curiosity, do you know your Cognitive type?

    Edit to add: I also have issues with image uploading. I have to go through many tries for my inserted image from files to be accepted by the server. So, I feel you on that.

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  • Princess of Hearts
    replied
    Ooookay, so here’s me being spontaneous and not over-thinking or waiting until a million ducks are in a row to say something
    SAME


    First thing I will say-summertime.
    Everything about summer is just the right fit for me, from the visuals-the sea, beaches, palm trees, beautiful coastal towns, long sunsets, in fall/winter it's like the sky is grey and then suddenly it's black, in summer there are so many stages you can see.
    Then the temperatures, the eating ice cream for dinner, the sheer freedom of it.
    Down to how I feel about myself, I never feel more like myself than in summer, I can go out right out of the shower with completely wet hair, I get to wear clothes I'm excited about and feel beautiful in and proud to wear. Not pants
    I love shine and sparkle and it never looks and feels as beautiful as it does in summer.
    I love everything more in summer, it's my season.



    When it comes to my living space I am not too fussy because I know my room is too small for what I want it to look like, I can live with white walls, basic furniture, mismatched bedding, etc. and it doesn't affect me, I am also quite messy and care for organization only when it's at the point that I can't find anything anymore, normally I'm not the one to be bothered by how my space looks.
    That said, I very much crave having beautiful things here and there, I love looking at home decor, I have nice blankets, love ambient lighting and use it as a substitute for more complicated decor, I put whatever pretty things I have on display to fill the empty spaces and give it a special touch.


    When I'm wearing something I really like I can't help but be obsessed with it, I'm constantly feeling my ruffles, my jewelry, thinking about how nice it looks in certain lighting, waving my hair around so I could catch whiffs of my perfume, I just enjoy every second of it
    I'm very conscious of how I feel in myself in the moment, for instance in summer (here we go again) I love having hair that's long enough so that I can feel it touching my waist, it makes me feel feminine and summery and mermaid-y.

    I love swatching makeup, smelling perfumes, looking for new shampoos and shower gels to try but I try my best to resist, I go through phases when I go manic and buy 5 shower gels at once but then I don't even think about it for months.


    Can't think of anything else for now.
    I wanted to post some images but I can't do it the way I used to for whatever reason and I don't like the alternative way so I'll try later!

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