Correcting Cognitive Distortions

[Mahat]

Here is a list of 15 common cognitive distortions. Which one(s) do you commit the most frequently, and how do you seek to correct it/them? See this thread as an exercise in mindful thinking and action.

https://psychcentral.com/lib/15-comm...e-distortions/

[Mahat]

Rather than pinpointing specific cognitive fallacies that I've committed, I'm going to explain the general framework I work with.

Here are the 4 principles I abide by:

1. Things are what they are - An event may happen but the interpretation of that event is the subjective framework we place on it not necessarily the way things actually occurred.

2. Nature isn't in accordance with our whims and agenda- As much as we can stategize and plan, for the most part, external events are beyond our control. Even if we can plan for every contingency, nature and reality will continue to run its course regardless of what our agenda is. However, that doesn't mean we shouldn't have agendas and desires, but rather we should be prepared for the fact that things will not always go as planned. If anything, this gives you more flexibility and power to maneuver through the world.

3. Sweeping claims require evidence - Since cognitive distortions are inherently fallacious, they're both logically unsound and invalid. When you actually break down the premises, they're nothing but sweeping logical leaps. For example, let's say you got a F on a test. You come to the conclusion that you're stupid. What actual proof do you have for that claim? That you failed a test? That would be circular logic which is another fallacy. The questions should be asked are: why weren't you prepared for the test? What did you not understand? Is the teacher's teaching style not compatible with your learning style? Did you get enough sleep? How did you study for the test? Etc. etc.

4. We ultimately have control over how we react to events - I'll explain more in detail below.

These 4 principles are common sense but common sense is often taken for granted. If these were self-evident, then we wouldn't need a model of common cognitive distortions to explain fallacious thinking that lead us away from these principles. What makes them so effective is that they're simple yet objective while cognitive distortions add a level of complexity that's unnecessary and counterproductive.

Since I've been on my medication, I've been a lot less moody and my self-esteem and sense of self-efficacy have increased. But while this is extremely important, it's not enough to provide me the resources to live a more meaningful life. Focusing on the root cause of my malaise is the the only way to empower myself. And while I like delve into my pain to feel the intensity and drama of it all and extract meaning from it, I'm ultimately the type of person to not dwell in my emotions for too long, and would rather channel my emotions by working towards a meaningful goal, so having a working, systematic model I can operate under to better achieve those goals is the most optimal for me. These principles provide the springboard to which I can more productively and effectively navigate the world.

It's difficult to correct fallacious thinking in the moment since it's second-nature for us, and it's fairly unnatural for most of us to do meta-thinking in the moment. But if I notice myself reacting too negatively or positively to a situation, I run it through this:

1. What is the trigger? What am I reacting to? (recall principle #1)
2. What is the emotion I am feeling and how intense is it?
3. Why do I feel this emotion?
4. How will I act in response to the situation and emotion?
5. What are the consequences of this action?

And it doesn't have to be detailed. It can only take a few minutes.

[Vive]

Before I start, there's something I like to mention. The big fun for me is that cognitively I already think: "yeah this is a distortion and it is not realistic", but the distortions are so omnipresent that they are basically parts of my fundamental unconscious beliefs.

Shoulds.
This one is a real pest. It slips into daily life so damn easily. Sometimes it's actually more verbalized in my thoughts, but usually I feel like I should be better, I didn't put enough effort into something. The thought is then that I should've done better. I have pretty much of infinite amounts of 'shoulds, oughts and musts in me'.

To give the tip of the tip of the iceberg that emerged during writing this post:
"I should express myself more clearly"
"I should be taking less time in writing this"
"I should be more efficient"
"I ought to have a larger vocabulary"
"I ought to work on something else"

Blaming myself and the internal control fallacy are also cognitive distortions that have seriously plagued me in the past. Much less so now. I learned that there are many cases in which you have very little control and there's much we don't have control over. I've gotten much better at letting go of my need for control.

I think I'm the least aware of the jumping to conclusions fallacy. I tend to intuitively make negative predictions about myself. While they are negative, this is not a 'worst case scenario' kind of thing. It's more that I expect I will mess up important things in my life from time to time. What are those ideas based on? Fears, and very very limited data. It is so hard to recognize, because the fallacy above is wrapped in emotional reasoning and complimented by occasional overgeneralization.

I can deal with one fallacy, but the real problems only start when the pressure has already built up, they hook into each other and they intensify. It's a negative spiral and it keeps going and going and together with that my self-esteem also drops, unless...

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I do more helpful things, like:

1. Accept what is, the more I can accept reality, the less you I suffer and struggle.
2. Take smaller steps towards your goals, A.K.A. lower my expectations and make them more concrete and achievable.
3. I cut myself some slack and think about counter-arguments and things I'm proud of.
4. Meditate or exercise
5. Seek a friend to talk to, to get the thought out of my head. This generally makes it easier to evaluate them clearly and it provides me with an outside perspective. I often forget how helpful this can be. Asking for help is generally not my forte.