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New Years Resolutions

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    New Years Resolutions

    let's hear'em!

    part of my new years resolution this year is to be...less of a callous bastard.

    everyone loves to be all like "hooooow can huuumans do such terrrrrible things?!", but tbh...I know the shit I would be capable of

    the truth is that it's very, very easy for me to dehumanize people. to be fair, I'm generally outwardly respectful when someone dies, but internally, my gut reaction is more like:

    "he was a gang banger. what did you expect?"

    "a dumb college broad died from a drug overdose? could'a told you that would happen..."

    "that meth head was a loser and there was no hope for him anyway"

    problem is, I'm a Christian, and we have to do this funny little thing called recognizing that all people are made in God's image. turns out, it's not easy for me to do in practice :/

    am I ever going to be more "sensitive"? probably not. that shit just doesn't hit me very hard emotionally, but at the very least, I think I can make the small change of toning down the schadenfreude and giving a quiet moment of quiet respect.


    • La Dame Aux Roses
      La Dame Aux Roses commented
      Editing a comment
      Can I make a suggestion on this front? I've felt similarly in the past, think it can have to do with protecting yourself or emotional exhaustion, for me I've been realizing that I probably have low cognitive empathy too...and I don't think it's too useful to think 'I should be more sensitive' partly because it's easy to make not being sensitive feel cool 😎 and partly because if you go around trying to break your heart over every tragedy on the face of the earth you won't have time to do anything else, and being sad because you're 'supposed' to be sad is a bit disingenuous.

      But if you know the kinds of things you'd be capable of then I think that's a path to empathizing people who you're inclined to write off. But more than anything, I'd suggest that instead of trying to feel a particular thing (don't think that's what you said but this can fall into similar territory) you just pray for the people that you are thinking about. Like just make a conscious effort to pray for these people, you don't have to feel or think a particular thing, but I think it can make a big difference in your attitude. And maybe try to act in parallel ways (as in, if you struggle with indifference to others, try to take active steps where you aren't indifference, actively wishing good).

      not to be preachy, just in case it helps at all

    anyways made (as always) a lot of New Years's resolutions, kinda forgot them by now though one thing was just trying to be patient, also trying to enjoy mediocrity a bit more, while still striving for excellence (: and that kind of thing, decided not to be too rigorous this year as I've been bouncing around not too far from rock bottom 🙃