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    Dream Diary

    I'll use this thread for my dream diary. I welcome any analysis or participation.

    #2
    I was in some kind of giant building - a mall or a school, but it wasn't being used for that. Some army had come in and taken over the building, and they were abusing people at gunpoint in a big auditorium. But I noticed that the entrance was wide open, at least four double-doors, all next to each other. So why didn't people just walk out? So I told Daeva, let's just leave. He was a little hesitant like: will they kill us if we leave? But then we decided it couldn't be worse than what they're doing here so we should go.

    We were basically trapped in the building (or understood this without trying to leave) but the building was huge. All the side rooms were filled with mattresses on the floor like this was some kind of training camp. So we found a remote room and claimed two mattresses out of about 5. People kept coming an going, and we weren't sleeping, just sitting there. At one point we changed rooms.

    Then someone - not one of the army of abusers, but a fellow captive - came in with a gun and pointed at me. For what it's worth he was plain looking, not sexually attractive or 'from my planet,' though I had nothing against him either and sensed his character was solid. At that point I was expecting anything to happen, so I was only mildly scared. I smiled and said something like, "Please stop doing that. It upsets me."

    His face changed. Although he kept the gun pointed (it looked more like a big weird machine than a gun, kind of like the tagging machine I use at work to price retail items) --- he smiled too and I knew he wasn't going to shoot me. He looked right in my eyes and said, "You're the one. You will save us."

    The first thing I thought was: I don't want anything to do with this. But words came out of my mouth as if I was possessed, and I felt an outside force taking over my eyes; they were burning. And I looked right back and the voice said through me, something like: "I will lead us to freedom. I won't stop until every last captive is free. We will destroy them."

    I felt Daeva looking at me from beside me, probably wondering how I made that decision or what had overcome me. But as we looked at each other I knew we were IN and we were going to do this together.

    Then, everything changed. It was kind of like the movie "Mr. Nobody," which I saw recently and it messed with my head due to all the Ne and Ni in it. But there was a sequence of events between two people, neither of which were similar to me or Daeva. The woman was a 269 and the man was a 9w8 with 5, both Sp/So, going by vibe. They had also gone through this same war together, but the scenes jumped around in time, and it all happened in flashes. One minute I'd see them from above in a grocery store (she had short curly hairspray hair) and the next minute laughing together, then arguing. It all slowed down with some vague sentiments like "We need to do this." The man was not a great artist but he drew the major events in his sketchpad, surrounded by connecting lines and shapes. There were two stocky gut type kids, about 8-10, outside - and the couple materialized in place (rather than this conglomeration of vague sentiments and snapshots)... and they went outside to explain they were getting divorced. Everyone was sad but the kids didn't quite understand and kept playing with a ball on a grassy hill. When the parents went inside, the man opened his sketchbook, where he thought his lines and charts had lead to the open door of 'goodbye,' but found instead, they were circling around in a loop. He followed them through a few pages and I can't remember the specifics, but it was something like "Work, recover, up, up, (arrows), plunge down, fight, fuck up.." basically showing the cycle of how he ruined things. It was more insightful than that, more specific, but I can't remember. He was a bit alarmed because he hadn't thought of it that way, it just showed up in his half-conscious tangled mess of a drawing. Then he said: "I've been stuck in a loop.... I need to get out... is there any way to fix this?" The woman had tears in her eyes and said "It's too late..." but it was clear she didn't mean it. And in that sad moment, infused with some hope, I woke up at 4am.

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