Excerpts from "Spiritual Dimensions" by Sandra Maitri

[Animal]

All of the text is copied directly from Sandra Maitri's book, The Spiritual Dimensions of the Enneagram. For each enneatype, four concepts are covered: Instinctual Subtypes, Soul-Child, Idealized Aspect, and Wings.

Following this post are the excerpts for each type, starting with the crown of the enneagram at Point Nine, and moving around the circle clockwise.

*Note: I do not, personally, encourage the use of "wings" and "instincts" in a typing process. At this point in my personal studies, I do not use wings and instincts at all. I would encourage reading these type descriptions more holistically, seeing how Maitri describes different potential manifestations of a type. In my view, these differences are related to tritype, CT, and environmental factors - so one does not need wings and instincts to justify the differences. However, it may be helpful to read all instincts and wings of each type to see the various sides of the type as Maitri viewed them.

The Instinctual Subtypes
According to the theory of the enneagram as taught by both Ichazo and Naranjo, each of us has one instinct that is a more central preoccupation than the others are, which is referred to as our subtype. There are three instincts, which Ichazo calls conservation, social, and syntony; and which Naranjo calls self-preservation, social, and sexual. The conservation or self-preservation instinct is a primary focus on physical survival, maintenance, and sustenance, although Ichazo seems to expand it to include the satisfaction of emotional and intellectual needs as well. The social instinct focuses on our relationship with others as a group and with society as a whole. The sexual, or syntony, instinct has to do with intimate relationships and our need to be syntonic or in tune with others. The theory goes that one of these arenas is more of a central concern for each of us. Just like our enneatype, our subtype does not change. Because this life area is a focal point for each of us, we are primarily oriented toward its satisfaction. We could say that we are sensitive to this area of life, in much the same way that we are sensitive to our Holy Idea: it is an area we feel vulnerable about and hence much of our energy goes to it.

The particular instinct that we are galvanized around is where the passion associated with our type is most pronounced. In other words, if you are a Social Two, for instance, your pride would be most pronounced around situations or issues that involve your status or social standing. If you are a Social Three, it is in that area that your lying would be most pronounced, and so on. This is one way of determining what your instinctual type is - by noticing where the passion of your enneatype is most apparent in your life.

As we will see in the following descriptions of each of the instinctual types and in the accompanying diagrams, there is a word or phrase that describes the style and central concern of each subtype. Most of these descriptors are those I learned from Naranjo, although in some cases I am using those of Ichazo, depending upon which seems more accurate.

Another layer of the theory taught by Naranjo is that the descriptors for the two instincts that are not our dominant one are exchanged. For example, if you are a Social Six whose descriptor is duty, your functioning in areas of self-preservation would be characterized by strength or beauty (depending on your gender), while in the relationship arena your functioning would be characterized by warmth. So, if male, you might approach situations involving self-preservation with machismo, while in intimate relationships, your manner would be warm and friendly. Rather than describing what the results of this switching for each subtype look like, I am simply giving this information here as food for further explorations.

Like the enneatypes themselves, which can all be seen as differentiations of the primary one, Enneatype Nine, so too each of the subtypes can be seen as differentiations of Point Nine on each of the instinctual enneagrams. All of the self-preservation subtypes, for instance, can be seen as different variations of satisfying survival needs, hungers, and appetites as indicated by the descriptor appetite at Point Nine.

The Soul-Child
(this section is very long so I put together the relevant bits)

The point preceding one's own in the inner flow [the integration point] is called the heart-point of each type.

[9 integrates to 3. 3 integrates to 6. 6 integrates to 9. 1 integrates to 7. 7 integrates to 5. 5 integrates to 8. 8 integrates to 2. 2 integrates to 4. 4 integrates to 1.]

This is because it is the heart of the following enneatype in the sense that it psychodynamically forms a deeper layer in the soul. Each type can be seen as a response and a reaction within the soul to its heart point. We will develop this idea in more detail shortly.

The point following one's own has been called by some enneagram writers the stress point. [disintegration point]

[9 disintegrates to 6. 6 disintegrates to 3. 3 disintegrates to 9. 1 disintegrates to 4. 4 disintegrates to 2. 2 disintegrates to 8. 8 disintegrates to 5. 5 disintegrates to 7. 7 disintegrates to 1.]

The idea is that under stressful situations, we move into the perspective of this point, taking on its mindset, its emotional tone, and adopting its behavioral style. This concept was not part of Naranjo's original teaching, and in my experience is not totally accurate. Moving with the arrows to the [disintegration point] might more correctly be thought f as following the line of least resistance in the personality. It is a more defensive position, and so takes us further from our inner depths. Our egoic position is more fortified here, and so we become more impregnable to any deeper truth filtering through our soul. So rather than questioning our position, we become more entrenched when moving into the mentality denoted by this point.

Our soul child has the qualities and characteristics of the heart point of our enneatype, and its core is the idealized Aspect of that point. In other words, the qualities of the idealized Aspect of each type's heart point are those that we had as children and that were not supported. Because these qualities were not allowed or encouraged, we suppressed them and developed our enneatype in counterpoint to them. In developing our enneatype, we tried, albeit unconsciously, to embody the qualities of the idealized Aspect of our enneatype, even though those of our heart point's idealized Aspect were closer to our core. Our type, then, functions in such a way as to suppress our heart point. The characteristics of our heart point are really crucial ones to bring to consciousness, since they bring us closer to our deeper truth. They are also the qualities most missing in our soul.

Like all children, the soul child is driven by the pleasure principle, and it wants only to do things that are fun and enjoyable- to a child. Because of this, adult pleasures like solving a difficult problem, assuming a responsibility at work that tests our mettle, clearing things up with a friend that involves saying some difficult things, and so on, are not things that look very interesting to our soul child. So it throws a tantrum inside or simply refuses to budge, and the adult part of us ends up exasperated and at wit's end about taking care of what we need to.

Because our soul child is a deeper layer within our personality structure, it feels more like who we really are. We are more deeply identified with it than we are with the layers that developed around it.

When we first get in touch with our soul child, it is usually through experiencing the negative qualities of the heart point, mostly the passion in its most infantile and exaggerated form. Because the soul child is a part of us that has been hidden away in the darkness of unconsciousness, like any living thing that is shut away for a long time, it gets a little twisted. Because of this, we often do not want to sink more deeply into ourselves for fear of encountering our soul child's negativity, which we usually experience as more truthfully what is going on within us, and also more final and unchanging. The sense of it being unchanging and unchangeable arises to the extent that we have closed the door on this part of ourselves- and so it indeed has not changed and so we infer that it never will. The more this part of us is brought out into the light of consciousness, however, the more kinks get straightened out and its negativity transforms. Again, we might think of the outer part of the soul child being all of its darkest and most troublesome qualities, and the deeper we penetrate into it with our awareness, the more essential its qualities become. Finally, at its core, we experience the essential state associated with our type's heart point.

The brief descriptions are intended as pointers toward inner exploration and the elaboration of understanding about one's own soul. It is important to remember that the qualities of the heart point are those we are most defended against and usually have the most judgements about. Because of this, our soul child may be a part of ourselves that we don't want to see and acknowledge. This may have made the material more difficult to take in than even the information on one's own type. In my experience, it takes many years of dedicated work to allow ourselves really to perceive - much less integrate - our soul child. Our biggest obstacle is our judgements and self-criticism about this part of ourselves, and disengagement from our superegos is necessary for this inner exploration. Although this part of our work on ourselves may be a difficult personal confrontation, it is infinitely rewarding, and our development as true adults depends on it.

The Idealized Aspect
A way to begin pinpointing your type is to identify which of the idealized Aspects is the one you most try to emulate, as well as the one that seems to you to be the answer to your problems. Below is a brief description of each of the Aspects and some of the ways each of the enea-types tries to embody them.


The Wings
The Wings, in the language of enneagram, are the two points on either side of an ennea-type. The theory, as originally presented by Naranjo, is that each enneatype is the midpoint between its wings. So in addition to other ways of understanding them, each enneatype can be seen as a blend of its two adjacent points. Among enneagram authors, Don Riso in particular has written extensively about the wings. Rather than seeing one's own enneatype as a mixture of the wings, he says that one wing is the strongest, and so he has developed a schema of subtypes based on the dominant wing. His approach to the wings, then, uses two points rather than three. This is an intriguing way of looking at the enneatypes and shows us once again how multidimensional a symbol the enneagram is, allowing for many levels of interpretation. What I am presenting has a different slant, and I am mentioning Riso's approach so that the reader will not be confused about the different ways the wings have been understood and described.

Looking at each enneatype as the interaction of its wings is an illuminating way of understanding some of our inner dynamics - the play of forces, pushes and pulls within the psyche that result in the beliefs, attitudes, behaviors, and emotions connected with our enneatype. One nuance of Naranjo's presentation of the wings is that the point "behind" an enneatype falls into the point "ahead" of it, moving clockwise around the periphery of the enneagram; so, for instance, if you are a Seven, Point Six falls into Point Eight, and the result would be Enneatype Seven. As with much about the wings, I will not elaborate or develop this point but leave it as an idea to be tried on and experimented with.

Understanding the wings may also give us useful insights into our own psychodynamics - the forces at work within each of us during our formative years, which shaped our soul in a particular way. Looking back over your childhood and adolescent years, you may notice that there were periods when one of the wings in your type was more dominant and other periods when the other was more so. It may even seem as if your type was each of the wings at these various junctures. Some people's experience is that they seemed to bounce back and forth between the wings as they were growing up, until their identity solidified in their enneatype. As adults, many people still feel the pulls in their psyche to one wing and then the other.

The brief descriptions of the interplay of the wings of each type that follow are intentionally sketchy, since my purpose is not to concretize things too much. Rather, what I hope to convey is a way of looking at and exploring the wings for yourself. Looking at each type as the midpoint where the mental fixations, core deficiency sates, and the passions meet is especially fertile. In the following, we will look at the intersections of various facets and levels of the wings, and how they result in certain characteristics of each enneatype.

[Animal]

Sandra Maitri: The Spiritual Dimensions of the Enneagram

Instincts

Sexual 9: Union
Sexual Nines are driven by a desire for the love of another and for total union, which appears to them as the key to their happiness. Total merging with another is seen by Sexual Nines to be what they need to be whole. They tend to merge easily with others, losing touch with themselves in the process. The substitution of another for what they really need to merge with - their essential nature - is the heart of a Sexual Nine's passion of laziness. Since this is the archetype of all the sexual types, this attempt to fill the hole left by loss of contact with Being with the love of another is shared by all of the subtypes that follow.


Social 9: Participation
Social Nines have a drive to belong, lacking the certainty that they actually do. They lack a sense of ease in social situations, because of their sensitivity to whether they are really welcome or not. They often feel that they don't know how to become part of the group, and, rather than being themselves, they try to fit n by emulating socially acceptable forms of behavior and communication. Inevitably this leaves them feeling that they are not really making contact, and so reinforces their sense of being left out. This attempt to participate through social conventions is how the passion of laziness manifests here, and in their resulting tendency to make superficial contact with others.


Self-preservation Nine: Appetite
The focus for a Self-preservation Nine is on satisfying his appetites and hungers. His laziness, in the sense that we have defined it as the passion, manifests here in the substitution of the nonessential satisfactions for those that he really needs. At the deepest level, this shows up in substituting material gratifications for those that are really spiritual. An example on a more superficial level of this substitution of the nonessential would be eating a chocolate bar when what he really needs is a nourishing meal. Also, as the word appetite suggests, Self-preservation Nines tend to overindulge, ingesting and acquiring far more than they actually need out of insecurity about receiving sustenance.


The Soul-child of Enneatype Nine (Point Three)
The heart point of Enneatype Nine is Point Three, so a Nine's soul child first makes her appearance in a tendency to deceive and lie in order to present to another what will get approval. Like a little child who takes a cookie when mommy has told her not to, or plays hooky from school pretending to be sick, a Nine's soul child pleads that she did not do it and that she really does have an upset stomach. Beyond the passion of lying, within every Nine is a young place that wants to be seen, wants to shine, and wants to be the center of attention. So there is a little show-off, wanting to do her dance and be applauded. Behind a Nine's self-abnegating tendency lies a drivenness and often a ruthlessness about succeeding - usually well hidden and pushed out of consciousness. Nines are often afraid of appearing too pushy and taking up too much space, which is the shadow of their soul child falling across their consciousness. The focus on doing underlies a Nine's inertia, and often Nines are afraid that if they start an activity, they will become driven and not be able to stop.

As a Nine allows herself to get in touch with this structure inside and its qualities, she will progressively experience herself as a more complete person. Exhibitionist tendencies will transform into a sincere recognition of her personhood. She will see that being a person n her own right was not supported during her childhood, and so she became accommodating and self-absenting in order to get approval. Reclaiming herself as personally valuable and lovable will lead her toward the realization of herself as a personal embodiment of Being, the Pearl Beyond Price, a radiant and luminous presence independent from the constraints of her conditioning. She will gradually become free of any self-image or mental construct defining who she is, and be able to contact and interact in the world liberated from the sleep of the personality.


The Idealized Aspect

Enneatype Nine: Living Daylight
Living Daylight is the experience of everything in the universe being made of love. It is the recognition of Being as what sustains and supports all of manifestation, and that our nature is inseparable from It. It gives us the sense of being held by a warm and benevolent presence and connects us with the goodness of life and of ourselves. Nines believe that these qualities are missing and are what they need. So they want to be included, noticed, loved, and appreciated by others, and want to contact the goodness of life and feel that they are included in its bounty. They fade into the background, harmonizing with others and rarely asserting themselves. They avoid conflict and try to keep things pleasant and comfortable both for themselves and others. Their focus is outward, on others and on the events in their lives. They are sensitive and open to the perspectives and points of view of others, and so mediate well. At the same time, they have difficulty determining what they think, feel, and believe. They tend to have a fuzzy, amorphous, or slightly out-of-focus feeling about them.


The Wings of Enneatype Nine
With Ego-Revenge (Eight) as one wing and Ego-Resentment (One) as the other, a Nine is caught between the bad boy of the enneagram on one side and the good boy on the other. Strong instinctual drives arise at Point Eight and meet strong superego prohibitions at Point One. Of necessity, what results is a deadening of impulse and stalling of movement. These are very strong pulls in different directions - what often feels like a hopeless conflict - so Enneatype Nine goes numb to his inner life and becomes outer rather than inner directed. Because of the profound and mostly unconscious inner discord, Nines set about trying to make and keep things harmonious, avoiding conflicts as much as possible.

[Animal]

Sandra Maitri: The Spiritual Dimensions of the Enneagram

Instincts

Self-Preservation 1: Anxiety
The satisfaction of their basic needs becomes fraught with anxiety for Self-preservation Ones. They have an underlying belief that they are not good enough to merit their needs being met, and because of this they worry in anticipation that something will go wrong and their survival will be endangered. This can become a self-fulfilling prophecy, causing them to take action preemptively or to do things badly out of their anxiety. Their passion of anger gets triggered if someone threatens their survival, a reflection of their deeper anger at themselves for not being perfect and so being unworthy of survival.

Social 1: Inadaptability
Social Ones express their social awkwardness and insecurity in stiffness. They have rigid ideas about how both they and others should behave socially, and their passion of anger arises when these ideas are not conformed to. Rather than going with the flow of what is happening in a social gathering, they try to impose what they think should be happening. They are uncomfortable with spontaneity, reflecting their underlying fear that they or others will do something wrong or inappropriate. They become critical and make others wrong for not conforming to their social standards, a reaction formation to their underlying sense of not being good enough to belong.

Sexual 1: Heat/ Jealousy
Sexual Ones have a vivacious, gushy, hyperanimated, and effusive style of behavior. This constant sense of being impassioned is a leaking of their sexual "heat" into their personality style. They are perpetually afraid that someone more perfect will come along and steal their partner, if they have one, and so are always on the alert for signs that their partner desires someone else. If they don't have a mate, they are convinced deep down that another, better person will be more desirable to their object of affection than they are. As Ichazo says, "Union with another is always threatened by someone more perfect."


The Soul-Child of Enneatype One (Point Seven)
Inside of the moralistic, righteous, and upstanding stance of a One is a young child who cares nothing about being good or doing the right thing. He only wants to play and have a good time and to take in all of the wonderful things that life has to offer - a little Seven. A One's soul child wants to sample every piece of chocolate and have a bite out of all the other children's cookies. He is a little glutton, wanting to grab exciting tidbits of everything he can get his hands on, and wanting to have three different activities going on so that he can jump from one to another whenever things get monotonous. His gluttony may reach hedonistic levels, in which the supressed essential quality of the Yellow or Joy makes its distorted appearance as indulgent pleasure seeking. The all-too-familiar Moral Majority spokesperson or evangelical Christian who gets caught with his hand in the till or his pants down is the leaking through of this sensualist and born vivant soul child.

As a One moves beyond his judgments and self-criticism, and is able to allow this pleasure-seeking young part of himself, the distorted manifestations will gradually transform. He will understand that behind his condemnations of the sinfulness and imperfections of others is an attempts to defend agains his own soul child. He tries so hard to be good because he got the message early on that his desire to have fun and play was not acceptable. Enjoyment itself was something that seemed taboo, and so life became hard work and a matter of shouldering a heavy burden. The more he penetrates his soul child's desires, the more he will get in touch with the love and delight in life itself that underlie them. Joy in the creation, the handiwork and manifestation of Being, will suffuse his heart, and he will turn his focus away from what is wrong with everything to how wonderful it all is.


The Idealized Aspect

Enneatype One: Brilliancy
The state of Brilliancy is one of completeness, wholeness, perfection, and purity. Ones attempt to embody these qualities and to impose them on others and the world around them. Ones have a very clear sense of what they consider right and wrong, and believe that if others behaved correctly in accordance with these standards, all would be well. So the dominant quality of Ones is an eye for imperfection, frequently accompanied by criticality and faultfinding, and trying to make things conform to what they consider to be right and good. Like Nines, their focus is outward, but here it is with resentment that things are not perfect and wth the agenda of making them so. Ones are firmly identified with their superegos and have difficulty understanding that whatever is happening is right. Chaos and disorder are difficult for Ones to tolerate, so they often are fastidious and tidy both in their personal appearance and in how they keep their various environments. They try to be what they consider good, and push out of consciousness what isn't. Energetically they feel sharp and crisp, and often have a pristine and clean quality.


The Wings of Enneatype One
As the midpoint between Ego-Indolence (Nine) and Ego-Flattery (Two), a One has a wing going to sleep on her essential nature on the one hand, and pride on the other. On the Nine side, there is a profound inner sense of worthlessness and resignation about oneself; and on the Two side, there is self-inflation and grandiosity. So there is the sense of valuelessness on the one hand, and an overvaluation of self on the other. What results is the One's sense of being basically flawed, but with the deadening to self and outer directedness of Nine plus the pride of Two, the badness gets projected outward - others are bad and need to be fixed.

Also, caught between the Nine's demand of herself to be universally loving and holding, and the Two's demand of herself to be someone who loves others and whom others love, Ones inevitably must identify with their superego and try to be perfect. And just as inevitably, they must also feel fundamentally not good enough at meeting these ultraloving demands. The sense of not being perfect also comes from the intersection of the Nine's sense of insufficiency and worthlessness, meeting the Two's fundamental sense of rejection.

[Animal]

Sandra Maitri: The Spiritual Dimensions of the Enneagram

Instincts

Self-Preservation Two: "Me First"
Self-Preservation Twos are afraid of being neglected and not having their needs met, so out of their survival anxiety, they take care of others so that others will take care of them. They have a self-sacrificing facade: this is the proverbial Jewish mother syndrome in which she appears to be thinking of others first and putting them ahead of herself, but in fact it is really manipulating them in this way on her own behalf. The passion of pride manifests here as a hidden sense of entitlement and privilege - a conviction that others must take care of them in compensation for their martyrdom, and that they deserve to keep the best bits in the kitchen for themselves.

Social Two: Ambition
Social Twos are social climbers, very conscious of social hierarchies and intent on being accepted and aligned with those at the top as a way of resolving their sense of not belonging. Who they are associated with and how important those people are gives them their sense of social standing. The passion of pride manifests here in the self-validation and sense of being worthwhile that arise when they have achieved the position and status that they are after. It also manifests in their refusal to be seen as unimportant or ordinary, rather than special and stellar in whatever group they are part of or aspire to be connected with.

Sexual Two: Aggression/Seduction
Ichazo gave only aggression as the descriptor of this subtype, and Naranjo distinguished between a female Two's seductive style and a male Two's aggressive one. Because of their insecurity about their desirability, Sexual Twos either seduce or force the other into relationship, depending on their gender. Once in a relationship, Sexual Twos also either entice or push their partner into doing what they desire, again depending on gender. Sexual Twos of both genders usually have tenacious attraction to an elusive partner. Female Twos are obsessed with the desire to be wanted, and male Twos are obsessed with overcoming all obstacles to union. In both cases, they are attempting to find personal value through love. The passion of pride manifests here in an extreme sensitivity about being desired or not, and sometimes as a pride in the number of sexual conquests one has made.


The Soul-Child of Enneatype Two (Point Four)
Behind the loving, giving and helpful outer facade of a Two lies a competitive, jealous and spiteful little Four-ish soul child. Twos try to present themselves as sweet and kind, self-sacrificing, humble, all of which can be seen as very much a reaction to the darker tendencies of their soul child. This is a little boy who wants to scream "I hate you!" to the other little boy who got the teacher or mommy's attention, pull his hair and tell him how awful he is and how stupid he is too. He is very observant about who gets how many cookies, tries to grab the most and the best and reacts with spite and venom if he does not get what he wants. He is filled with envy, believing the other kids have what he lacks and that they are better than he, cuter and more lovable. He can be bitchy and back biting, vindictive and huffy.

For a Two, the negativity and pettiness of his soul child are often initially difficult to acknowledge and tolerate. It threatens all of his pretense of open-heartedness and harmlessness, but most of all, it puts him first. This is, in fact, the very thing necessary for a Two's unfoldment - getting in touch with himself is central. As a Two contacts his soul child and, instead of rejecting him, judging him and pushing him away, opens his heart to him, he will become primary in his own consciousness. This is very taboo for a Two, who learned that being self-centred set him up for parental disapproval. He will find that as he focuses more on himself - listening to and filling his own needs, responding to his own impulses and taking his own initiative, recognising his limits and setting them with others - he indeed becomes more centred within himself. This is not the negative thing he feared, signifying loss of love and becoming more selfish to him, but rather is a doorway into his personal connection with Being. The more he takes care of himself instead of others, in other words, the more he connects with the spark of the Divine within, realising himself as the Point. Instead of having others be the point of his existence, around whom he orbits, he finds himself one with Being, a star in his own universe.


The Idealized Aspect

Enneatype Two: Merging Gold
The state of Merging Gold is one of blissful, ecstatic union. It is a dissolving of the separating boundaries of the personality, resulting in a sense of oneness with another of Being Itself. It is the state of being in love, merging and melting into oneness with one's beloved. Twos long for this kind of union, believing intimate contact, either physical or emotional, is the thing that they most need. Being loved and connected to that special other is a Two's deepest desire. Twos emulate the characteristics of Merging Gold by attempting to be someone others will love and consider special. They are sensitive to the emotional states and needs of others and try to be there for them so that they will be loved in return. Twos are acutely attuned to any sense of rejection by others and will go to great lengths to be loved and accepted. While it is difficult for them to ask for attention directly, they become quite demanding and prideful if they feel that they are being ignored or overlooked. Twos often feel to others sticky, clingy, and needy, as well as filled with their own self-importance.


The Wings of Enneatype Two
With the wings of Ego-Resentment (One) on one side and Ego-Vanity (Three) on the other, Twos have the inner demand to be a perfect person while feeling basically flawed on the one hand, and the demand to present a perfect image on the other hand. These requirements to be perfect inside and out are impossible to meet, so a Two feels hopeless about himself and turns to others for salvation, and hence he becomes dependent upon them. From another angle, the high morality of Oe meets the duplicity and amorality of Three, and the result is that Twos constantly feel guilty. And from another perspective, the One-ish drive to be a good person plus the Three-ish drive to impress others leads to the Two's pattern of looking to others for approval and recognition as being a lovable person. Additionally, the Three's drive to create himself as a person, plus One's need to be good, equals the Two's drive to present and shape himself into the image of a really good and lovable person.

[Animal]

Sandra Maitri: The Spiritual Dimensions of the Enneagram

Instincts

Self-preservation Three: Security
Self-preservation Threes equate inner security with having enough money and a reliable position in the world. To this end, they strive relentlessly to assure their survival, which feels perpetually in jeopardy to them. This is the subtype of the workaholic who cannot take a break, and the self-made man who accumulates a fortune and yet feels that his survival is still precarious. The passion of lying arises here as deceiving oneself that amassing huge amounts of wealth will give the soul the security it lacks. Lying is also used by Self-preservation Threes to get what they think will give them the security they hunger for.

Social Three: Prestige
The way Social Threes feel they can relate to others is through having a prestigious image. The description of this subtype given by Ichazo (via Lilly and Hart) is "the need for a good public image." For Social Threes, then, the focus is on how they are seen, and they will change their image to fit the values of a particular social group in order to be seen in a good light. Like Social Twos, they want to be socially important; but unlike Twos, they want to be important in their own right rather than through those with whom they are associated. The passion of lying manifests here in doing whatever they need to do to create their prestigious image. Their deepest lie is that this image is who they realy are.

Sexual Three: Masculinity/Femininity
To Sexual Threes, physical and sexual appeal seems like the key to being desired, so they emphasize their gender characteristics. As a general style, the males exaggerate their virility and masculinity, and the women intensify their femininity. When attracted to someone, they take on the attributes of that person's inner masculine or feminine ideal - in Jungian terms, shaping themselves into the other's animus or anima. They are competitive with others about being seen as the most attractive, and being successful is measured by being desired. The passion of lying manifests here in deceiving themselves that love is the answer, that they must shape themselves into their beloved's ideal to be loved, and ultimately that they are their image. It also appears in their use of duplicity to out-maneuver their rivals and wn over the object of their desire.


The Soul-Child of Enneatype Three (Point Six)
Six is the heart point of Enneatype Three, so behind the efficient and composed veneer of a Three lies a very frightened child. Shy, timid, self-doubting, and insecure, this soul child experiences the world as a hostile and malevolent place. Others appear threatening, sometimes to the point that he may develop paranoia that they are out to get him, and no matter how many achievements a Three has accomplished and how much outer success he has created, he still experiences himself deep down as one of the weaklings in the struggle for survival. In fact, all of a Three's efforts at attainment can be seen as a reaction to his fearful soul child - an attempt to overcome and counter this part of himself. This explains why no amount of success is ever enough for him. Without digesting and integrating his soul child, the inner fear and insecurity cannot be resolved by any amount of status and power. From the perspective of the soul child, a Three's image is an attempt to camouflage this scared and immature part of himself.

Coming to grips with this child who experiences the ground beneath him as inherently shaky and unsupportive is necessary for the development of a Three. As he increasingly acknowledges his fear and sees how much of a driving force it is within his psyche, his anxious inner child will feel held and thus more secure. The allowing itself will in time transform his fear into an inner confidence, support, and ease, and a Three will understand how these very qualities that he had as a young child were not tolerated or supported by his early environment. It may be that family circumstances challenged and eventually eroded his original embodiment of essential Will, or that the ease with which he could do things made him a target of envy and hatred by parents or siblings, and undermined his self-confidence. Regardless of the psychodynamics, as a Three's soul child is integrated into his consciousness, the more his inner ground will feel secure and solid. Through the sense of Essence as his true foundation, his soul will relax into the support of Being. His drivenness, fueled by his anxious soul child, will in time transform into the inner calm and effortlessness of true Will.


The Idealized Aspect

Enneatype Three: The Pearl
The Pearl, or Personal Essence, is the state of being a person whose consciousness, life, and interactions are informed by Being. It is the state of being truly autonomous, free of all object relations and mental constructs defining who you are, and so it is the state of being a real person - an individuated embodiment of True Nature. Threes want to fulfill their potential and fully realize themselves, but this gets translated by the personality into cultural, material, and sometimes spiritual success rather than into actual unfoldment. They imitate the characteristics of the Personal Essence by believing they are functioning independently, while they are actually being shaped by and conforming to prevailing cultural images. They transform themselves into the image others want to see, and focus on their activities and accomplishments. Their sense of value is determined by how successful their performance is, and so they have difficulty not being active. Getting the job done is the most important thing to them, and so they overexert and subordinate physical needs, feelings, and inner experience in that pursuit. Focusing on their presentation, they deceive themselves and others to fulfill the image they are trying to present. Threes often seem slick and polished, as well as slippery, disingenuous, and sometimes just plain fake.


The Wings of Enneatype Three
With Ego-Flattery (Two) on one side and Ego-Melancholy (Four) on the other, Threes lack an inherent sense of direction and momentum, and at the same time feel cut off and abandoned by Being. The result is that they feel cut off from any natural inner sense of depth and dynamism, and so they feel that they must live their life on the surface of themselves, in image. They also end up feeling that they must become little gods, creating themselves and their lives and maintaining them. Also, caught between the Two's dependency on others and the Four's sense of abandonment, Threes give up on counting on or turning toward others and experience themselves as totally self-reliant and self-determined. From an emotional angle, caught between the two most emotive enneatypes, both prone to depression and hopelessness, Threes swing into action and immerse themselves in doing, losing touch with what they feel in their focus and accomplishment.

[Animal]

Sandra Maitri: The Spiritual Dimensions of the Enneagram

Instincts

Sexual 4: Competition/ Hate
Sexual Fours compete with others of their own sex in their attempt to find love. Their competitiveness is based n a sense that love is scarce and so it needs to be fought for. They try to convince their rivals and the object of their affection that they are better than the competition, and their wish to "disappear" their challengers is a form of hatred. The choice of object of desire is determined by how many other people want that person, so that, too, arises out of competition. Sexual Fours are not only competitive in the relationship arena - competition is their dominant behavioral characteristic - but it is there that it is most pronounced. The passion of envy manifests here as wanting someone another has or desires and in their underlying hatred of their rivals.

Self-Preservation 4: Dauntlessness
The term given by Ichazo for Self-preservation Fours is defensive action, as opposed to dauntlessness, which Naranjo associated with this subtype. Ichazo, quoted by John Lilly and Joseph Hart, defines defensive action as "protecting one's dream of the future." Rather than be limited by their circumstances, they wil rashly go after what they want and feel that they must have to survive. They take action to preserve themselves but do not consider the consequences, and actually put their survival in peril. A Self-preservation Four might, for instance, buy herself all sorts of beautiful things that she feels she can't live without, and end up sliding deeply into debt. Or, feeling unable to bear the constraints of a boring job, she might throw caution to the wind and on the spur of the moment buy herself a ticket to some exotic island. The passion of envy manifests here as wanting the security and material gratificatons others seem to possess, and recklessly striking out to get them.

Social 4: Shame
Social Fours have the notion that there is a right way to be, and they are perpetually ashamed because they are not that way. They have a fundamental sense of not fitting in and not being able to do things properly in order to fit in. Social Fours tend to be formal and a bit stiff, paying a lot of attention to their manners. Behaving properly is very important to them, since it is an attempt to cover their deeper sense of social inadequacy. Others appear to Social Fours to match the standard they have for themselves, and so they experience the passion of envy toward them and turn their hatred toward themselves in the form of shame.


The Idealized Aspect

Enneatype Four: The Point
The experience of the Point is self-realization - it is the recognition that who you are Essence. The actual experience is sometimes of being a shining star emerging out of the vast blackness of space, luminous and radiant, with a sense of meaning, value, importance, and appreciation for our individual uniqueness. Fours want to be seen as unique, original, and authentic, since they lack this sense of identity with Being. Because of their estrangement from Being, they often feel lonely and disconnected, and long for a sense of relatedness with others. They are acutely sensitive to being abandoned and neglected, and tend to dramatize their emotions and often feel dissatisfied and melancholic. Others seem to Fours to have what they lack, and what they have and who they are never seems quite enough. They seem to suffer more than others, and their longing for authenticity makes them controlling of themselves and of others. Fours may seem sad or depressed, but this is not always the case. Some seem happy enough although somewhat dissatisfied, with an air of vacancy despite the apparent strength of their emotions.


The Soul-Child of Enneatype 4 (Point 1)
Within the dramatic, intense, and emotional facade of a Four is a bossy and pushy little One-ish soul child who is intent on all the other little kids behaving properly - seeing to it that none of them jumps the line, that their clothes are tidy, and that their manners are good. This soul child is a Goody-Two-shoes, prim and proper, and critical of all those who don't follow the rules. She is a stickler for fairness and correctness and gets quite angry when the other kids are bad. They are the problem children who need to be straightened out, and in this we see the Four's tendency to blame others for their problems, as well as their defensiveness when an "imperfection" about them is pointed out.

Acknowledgeing this self-righteous and resentful little soul child is difficult for a Four, since it feels like her biggest flaw, opening her up to tremendous self-attack and self-hatred. Rather than imploding her agression and directing it towards herself, bringing her soul child to consciousness is really a huge part of solving her inner suffering. The more she sees it, the more she acknowledge her defensiveness and her need to be right, and in so doing, her soul is gradually able to relinquish its control. Understanding her need to control others and make them do what she wants will expose her lack of perception of perfection of things as they are and, more important, of her own perfection. As she progressively integrates her soul child, she will see how the purity, luminousity, and inherent brilliancy of her soul were not allowed or mirrored in her childhood.

Losing touch with the Aspect of Brilliancy, which she most embodied, she felt damaged, and developed in reaction a personality stype based on estrangement, abandonment, and longing for connection outside of herself. The more she integrates her soul child, the more the little do-gooder will transform into a shining sense of inner completeness, perfection and elegance. Instead of living a life based on envy or mourning, and longing from a far for contact, she will find that the completeness she seeks is within and that the grass inside is very brilliant indeeed.


The Wings of Enneatype Four
As the midpoint between Ego-Vanity (Three) and Ego-Stinginess (Five), Four is the place where the sense of being an independent operator creating her own laws and universe meets the sense of being an ultimately separate entity. The result is a profound sense of estrangement from the dynamism of life and from other people. The drive, then, for Fours is to connect, to make contact with something authentic both in themselves and others. And the emotional state, resulting from the interaction of the dry emptiness of Five and the sense of inner nothingness of Three that characterizes the core of both, is the isolated despair and hopelessness of Four.

From another angle, the achievement and goal orientation of Three plus the sense of isolation and lack of connection of Five result in the striving of Four for reconnection with an authentic inner source. A Four's image, then, becomes that of someone who is longing for the real.

[Animal]

Sandra Maitri: The Spiritual Dimensions of the Enneagram

Instincts

Self-Preservation Five: Refuge
In this case, I am using Ichazo's term for the Self-preservation Five subtype - refuge, rather than the one Naranjo gave, home - as I think it conveys more the feeling of what a Self-preservation Five seeks. Self-preservation Fives want to ensure their survival by finding a safe place that they can withdraw to and within which they can insulate themselves from the world. So they are preoccupied with the creation of and vigilance over a personal refuge. They guard their space and their privacy, retreating from others and the world as a way of taking care of themselves. The passion of avarice manifests within this subtype in this reclusive squirreling away of themselves, as well as in stockpiling their resources, especially money.

Social Five: Totems
Social Fives have, as Lilly and Hart relate of Ichazo's definition, "heroes to live up to." They are very conscious of social hierarchies, and as the word totem implies, they want to be one of the faces on the totem pole. A totem is a symbol or emblem representing a family or social group, and this is what a Social Five lives in the shadow of and also wants to be. He is very aware of social archetypes and wants to embody them, becoming an exemplar or a fount of knowledge. He may develop expertise in a specialized field in which he wishes to be the next in the lineage, and wants to be seen as such. His passion of avarice manifests as a holding on to whatever he considers gives him his social standing.

Sexual Five: Confidence
Sexual Fives lack confidence in their attractiveness, capacity for relationship, and sexual performance. This makes it difficult for them to follow through on their attractions, despite the false confidence that they manifest as a compensation for their sense of inadequacy or undesirability. As Ichazo says, a Sexual Five "needs someone he feels safe with - a refuge" in order to overcome his inhibitions. The passion of avarice manifests here as a holding back of his affection for fear of being rejected and a holding on to his love object once he has set his sights on her.


The Soul-Child of Enneatype Five (Point 8)
Inside of every self-enclosed, withdrawn, and quiet Five lives a little Eightish soul child who dreams of getting even and of devouring endless pints of ice cream. This soul child delights in getting down and dirty, slogging it out with the other kids, and lustfully immersing himself in life. His soul-child may show up as a Five curses the other drivers within the isolation of his own car, as he screams at the referee while watching a football game on TV, or as he condemns all of the politicians as crooks while listening to the evening news. A Five's soul child can be a little bully and a little bigot, convinced that he is right and closed to any other possibilities. He may be defensive and denying about any perceived weakness, reacting with aggression when challenged. He can be punitive and vindictive, wanting to get even with others who he feels have wronged him.

For a Five, these tendencies of his soul child can be challenging to acknowledge and allow, since they betoken a zesty and gutsy engagement with life that appears very threatening. As a child, his wholehearted and passionate engagement in life for one reason or another was not supported. His vibrancy and aliveness, his strength and his courage - his embodiment of the Essential Aspect of the Red - was damped down. The vindictive and self-avenging tendencies of his soul child when it first appears may well be his soul's response to this stifling. In reaction to his Red not having been allowed, a Five withdrew and cut himself off from his own vitality. As he allows his lusty and dynamic soul child to surface, a Five will gradually reconnect with his aliveness and will progressively feel more part of life itself. As he integrates his soul child, his knowing becomes more embodied and inclusive since his heart and his belly also become involved. As he contacts the courage to face the unknown, his life becomes more and more of an exciting and engaging adventure that he is fully and heartily immersed in.


The Idealized Aspect

Enneatype Five: Diamond Guidance
The experience of Diamond Guidance is that of understanding and knowing in a deeply embodied and experiential way. It is the capacity to analyze and synthesize information from the present and the past instantaneously and to grasp something in an all-inclusive manner. Fives feel that what they need is knowledge, and they imitate this intuitive understanding through trying to make sense of life by observing it from a distance. They substitute detachment for objectivity, mental knowledge for active engagement in life, and tend to be loners who spend a lot of time by themselves and resent intrusions by others into their solitude. They live in their own bubble, feeling and maintaining a sense of isolation, which protects them from the impingements and demands that they fear. Dogged by an inner sense of impoverishment and insubstantiality, Fives seem empty, dry, and weak. They often seem withdrawn, pulled into themselves, withholding their vitality and engagement with others and with life in general. They tend to live simply and frugally, rarely wasting energy on resources.


The Wings of Enneatype Five
With Ego-Melancholy (Four) on one side and Ego-Cowardice (Six) on the other, Five is the blend of longing for an authentic connection with a source on the one hand, and fear, self-doubt, and insecurity on the other. The result is the Five's attempt to know, to scout the territory ahead and connect with it through knowledge, while staying at a safe distance from everything experientially. Also, with the Four's sense of being cut off and abandoned and the Six's survival anxiety, the result is the Five's avarice - the hoarding and holding on to everything she has out of fear that it will be taken away from her. From another angle, the Four's inner sense of hopelessness and certainty of being forsaken plus the Six's fear of others and the world at large result in the self-enclosure and isolation of Fives.

[Animal]

Sandra Maitri: The Spiritual Dimensions of the Enneagram

Instincts

Self-preservation Six: Warmth
Warmth describes the style of Self-preservation Sixes. They are warm, friendly, and affable, making themselves likable to others as a way of ensuring their survival. The term Ichazo used for this subtype is affection, indicating that this is what they see as key to preserving themselves. Perceiving others as a threat to their survival, Self-preservation Sixes use their geniality to befriend and align themselves with others to offset the possibility of others turning against them. The passion of fear manifests here in this apprehensiveness around their self-protection.

Social Six: Duty
To a Social Six, fulfilling what she sees as her social role dutifully is the only way to be. She attempts to resolve her social insecurity by giving authority to a belief, a group, or a leader whom she considers more powerful, and becoming faithful, deferential, accommodating, malleable, and obedient to it or him. She is loyal, devoted, even fawning and obsequious in the carrying out of her mission on behalf of the authority, whatever she considers that to be. Her passion of fear appears here as being afraid of crossing her authority figure and being afraid of breaking social norms and obligations.

Sexual Six: Strength/Beauty
Sexual Sixes have an underlying attitude of self-doubt regarding their sexual attractiveness and their desirability. Fundamentally they are afraid that they will not be loved, and this is where their passion of fear shows up most strongly. They are afraid to make intimate contact with another, and try to hide their fear behind exaggerating their strength (in the males) or their beauty (in the females). Male Sexual Sixes emphasize their machismo, attempting to appear virile, manly, and tough. Emotionally they may appear callous and arrogant. Female Sexual Sixes play up their attractiveness, using their capacity to attract as a way of stilling their fear about really connecting with another.


The Soul-Child of Type Six (Point Nine)
Within every Six is lazy little one - very Nine-ish - who just wants to stay under the covers, doesn't want to go out and face the world, wants only to be comfortable and entertained. Because of this, Sixes are often afraid that if they relax into themselves, they will become inert, never moving or bestirring themselves again; and they fear that they will neglect what they need to in their lives. This is, of course, because hidden from consciousness is this young part that does not want to do anything at all except luxuriate in leisures and distractions. This inner indolence is really the heart of a Six's fear - she is perhaps more afraid of this tendency in herself than of anything else, fearing that if she stops pushing herself with her false will, all will be lost and she will sink into a swamp of laziness. If she is not making efforts, she is afraid that nothing will happen and that her life will go down the tubes.

When a Six courageously allows herself to stop striving and lets herself be, she may initially experience an immobility or lack of desire to do anything at all. In time, the inertia and indolence of her soul child will transform into what it is replicating; the loving holding of Being, a sense of being held in embrace of the Divine, knowing herself to be made up of love and one with all of existence. The sweetness and benevolence of the universe - the dimension of Living Daylight - will become part of her sense of self, and the fear in her soul will gradually subside as she realizes more and more completely her inextrivcable connection to Being. Eventually the whole mind-set of being frightened of others will diseappear as she recognizes that her nature is the same as all that exist, and that all sense of self and other is illusory. Without Being as her inner ground and her perception of its continuity in all outer forms, she has indeed found the rock she can truly stand on.


The Idealized Aspect

Enneatype Six: Will
Essential Will is the experience of inner support, which gives us a sense of confidence in our ability to persevere and bounce back when faced with difficulties. Will infuses us with a sense of steadfastness, definiteness, groundedness, solidity, commitment, persistence, and indestructibility. Out of touch with Will, Sixes lack faith in their capacity to defend and protect themselves, so they are frightened, unconsciously feeling always at risk of not surviving. Plagued by self-doubt, uncertainty, indecisiveness, and insecurity, Sixes think that their fear will be resolved if they can find something or someone who will give them confidence and who can dispel their doubt. To resolve their fear, phobic Sixes want a person or a cause they can believe in and become blindly loyal to, and counter-phobic Sixes try to become that for others. Subordinating their will or, conversely, imposing their will on others, becomes the personality's imitation of real Will. Likewise, being suspicious of authority and either covertly or overtly being defiant of it become a Six's way of having his own will. Energetically Sixes feel to others frightened and suspicious.


The Wings of Enneatype Six
As the midpoint between Ego-Stinginess (Five) and Ego-Planning (Seven), Six is the uneasy intersection of the Five's movement away from others and the world and the Seven's gluttonous movement toward them. Fives hide, while Sevens are drawn outward to taste everything in life, and Sixes end up vacillating and stuttering in doubt, unsure whether to move forward or back, to reach out or to withdraw. The inner sense of emptiness and barrenness of Fives plus the need of Sevens to be and feel upbeat leaves Sixes unsure about what they are feeling.

From another angle, the inner sense of desiccated emptiness of Five plus the optimism of Seven results in the main object relation into which Sixes fall: idealizing an authority figure on whom high hopes are projected from a one-down position.

[Animal]

Sandra Maitri: The Spiritual Dimensions of the Enneagram

Instincts

Sexual 7: Suggestibility.
Sexual Sevens tend to merge with whatever ideas, plans, or people they come into contact with. So they are easily influenced, especially by their partner or someone they are attracted to. The prospect of a relationship with someone sets off their mapping and planning, and the relationship gets projected well into the future, with infinite possibilities appearing just over the horizon. So they are suggestible in the sense of being easily swayed and impacted, as well as in the sense of being easily propelled into myriad fantasies by or about a relationship. The passion of gluttony appears here in the many attractions that Sexual Sevens tend to have and in their difficulty in forming deep, long-term contact with one person.

Self-preservation 7: Family.
Naranjo originally used the term 'family' for Self-preservation Seven. Ichazo's term, defenders, captures a different nuance of the same style: Self-preservation Sevens try to assure their survival through banding together and taking care of others who they feel an affinity or connection with. They become patriarchs, taking care of their extended family. Self-preservation Sevens share the amicability of their Six neighbors, appearing magnanimous, supportive, and fatherly. The passion of gluttony appears here as a hunger for tastes of anything that seems to promise survival, whether ideas, theories, nutritional support, plans to get rich quick, and so on.

Social Seven: Sacrifice
Social Sevens are characterized by relinquishing their personal freedom and aspirations for social ideals. They have a profound sense of obligation toward others and feel that they must sacrifice themselves to fulfill what they see as their responsibilities. Their sacrifices are in the service of a future that they imagine and make plans to realize - a future that promises to give them the sense of belonging, social acceptance, and social standing that they lack. The passion of gluttony manifests here as a hunger for this sense of social ease and for all of the things that they believe will give it to them. Ichazo (per Lilly and Hart) uses the descriptor social limitations and describes this subtype as "predetermining his social activities," which highlights a different nuance of this subtype. It points the Social Seven's tendency to map and plan his social involvements to resolve his social insecurity.


The Soul-Child Of Enneatype Seven (Point 5)
Wthin every seemingly magnanimous and happy-go-lucky seven is a very miserly, witholding, and withdrawing soul child -a little Five. She holds on to what she has tenaciously, storing all of her candy and her toys away so that the other kids cannot get at them and take them from her. Driven by fear of loss and an inner sense of scarcity, she feels empty inside and afraid that no more sustenance will come her way. For all of a Seven's apparent gregariousness, optimism, and interest in life, this young place inside wants to hide from life and connect with it from a distance. This soul child can also be a nerdy little know-it-all who relies primarily on her intellect. It is likely that in a Seven's childhood, her reclusive, self-enclosing, and solitary tendencies were not allowed, and that she got the message that she needed to be more externally oriented and buoyant. It is also likely that her mental skills got supported and developed at the expense of a more innate and intuitive understanding, turning her into a little egghead who felt disconnected from the other kids. A Seven's sunniness became a way of masking and defending against her inner sense of scarcity and of not belonging, not feeling part of the group or family and not fitting in.

It is very difficult for a Seven, with her need to be cheery, optimistic, and enthusiastic about things, to acknowledge this withdrawn, frightened, and reclusive young part of herself. What feels the most difficult is the sense of scarcity that drives her soul child - the parched inner emptiness and dryness - which initially feels life threatening for a Seven to make contact with. The more she does not judge and reject this part of herself, the more the avaricious and isolating tendencies will transform, especially as her sense of being an ultimately seperate entity - and thus one who is cut off from the rest of existence - is challenged. Her geeky, nebbishy, and bookish qualities will transmute into true embodied knowing, that of the Diamond Consciousness. As her sense of ultimate separation from being and from others comes into question, and her inner desert blooms with all of the flowers of Essence, her soul will truly know directly. She will feel part of the Whole, understanding experientially that separation is impossible, and her okayness will be real rather than reactive.


The Idealized Aspect

Enneatype Seven: The Yellow
The Essential Aspect of the Yellow is the experience of joy, delight, appreciation, and simple happiness. It is a warmth in the heart, which might be ebullient and bubbly or calm and deep. Sevens want to feel this gentle happiness rather than their parched and dry inner emptiness. So they look for stimulating ideas and things to get excited about, and their style is one of appearing optimistic, enlivened, enthusiastic, and above all, okay. They try to plot their course toward whatever holds the promise of joy, and so mapping and planning are central to their process. Lacking trust in their natural unfoldment, they try to make their inner process conform to their mental map, which they hope will lead them to the treasure that will finally bring them happiness. Driven by fear of how things will unfold, they always have backup maps and plans. They usually have many different things they are interested in and can get excited about, and lose their motivation when things get repetitive and difficult. Sevens often seem wired and mental, charming and talkative, but sometimes leaving you wondering where the substance is.


The Wings of Enneatype Seven
At Seven, the doubt of Ego-Cowardice (Six) meets the lust for life of Ego-Revenge (Eight). The result is the Seven's wanting a little taste of everything in life but, because of her fear and doubt, not fully immersing herself in anything. Like Eights, Sevens are stimulated and excited by all the things of the world, but because of their fear, the contact stays primarily mental and thus presumably safe. Eights are sensory oriented, and Sixes doubt their experience, so Sevens end up sampling a lot of things but questioning everything.

Also, the Six's self-doubt, lack of confidence, and insecurity plus the Eight's drive to be the top dog, dominating and triumphing over others, result in the Seven's characteristic visions and grand plans for what she is going to achieve, a fraction of which she takes the chance to try to realize.

[Animal]

Sandra Maitri "Spiritual Dimensions of the Enneagram"

Instincts

Self-preservation 8: Satisfaction
Eights are fixated on what they believe will bring them satisfaction of their needs, and they gobble up what they think they need, often at the expense of filling their real needs. So the drive for satisfaction leaves little room to figure out what it is that they really require. Their insecurity about self-preservation manifests in dominating and controlling behaviors around what they consider their turf, and around sustenance and support - keeping watch over what and how much is eaten out of the refrigerator, for instance, or where exactly her husband is spending their money. The passion of lust manifests in the voracity of their drive for satisfaction.

Sexual 8: Possession/ Surrender
Both male and female Sexual Eights try to possess and control their mates. While Sexual Eights can be overtly domineering, it is an attempt to cover their insecurity about being loved and desired. Both male and female Sexual Eights see relationship as conquest and want to hold the power in the relationship so that they don't have to feel vulnerable and dependent. Female Sexual Eights want to surrender control to a partner who they see as worthy, and may make a passionate appearance of surrender while staying very much in control. The passion of lust manifests here as the desire to possess the body and soul of an Eight's beloved.

Social 8: Friendship
Social Eights attempt to resolve their sense of not belonging by maintaining friendly social relationships. Being a "buddy" is what Social Eights see as key to resolving their social insecurity. Friendship here is a very deep bond, one implying undying trust and loyalty, a sense of fraternity and being part of the same gang. An Eight's domineering and controlling tendencies manifest in the area of social relationships for a Social Eight. Breeches of trust or friendship might result in a vendetta and are not easy for a Social Eight to forgive. The passion of lust manifests here in the passionate and possessive nature of these bonds with others.


The Idealized Aspect

Enneatype 8: The Red
The Essential Aspect of the Red gives us a sense of aliveness, vitality, vibrancy, strength, and capacity. It gives us initiative and forcefulness, boldness and daring. Eights believe that strength is the answer, and so they attempt to control and dominate, to bully and overwhelm to gain a sense of it. They have little tolerance for what they consider weakness or deficiency, and so have difficulty with "soft" feelings, especially pain and fear, both in themselves and others. Imitating the Red, they engage life with gusto and passion, forcefully and aggressively going after what they want. With the need to be in charge and take the lead, they have difficulty not being the boss and going along with someone else's wishes. They are fighters for what they believe in, and just as the Red is the power to defend what is real, Eights are fierce defenders of what they consider to be the truth. They seem to others large in energy, with a strong and powerful presence even when they aren't saying a word. Some Eights seem to have a perpetual chip on their shoulders, meeting life with belligerence and bluster. They have difficulty being vulnerable and receptive, tend to stay very much in control and in charge, and often feel energetically hard.


The Soul-Child of Enneatype Eight (Point Two)
Within the tough and no-nonsense Eight who delights in testing her grit and that of others, dominating and controlling life, and triumphing over any adversity lies a needy, clingy and lonely little Two-ish soul child who is desperate to be loved and held. An Eight's soul child wants to snuggle up to others, getting as close as possible, and can be insistent and demanding about it. Beneath an Eight's show of strength is this soul child who is filled with all of the emotions she considers weak- needing others, fearing rejection, insecurity, and a deep sense of sadness and loneliness. With the sense that her contactful and loving qualities were not wanted as a child, an Eight reacted by essentially saying "Fuck you!" to everyone she felt dependent on, and set out to prove she didn't need anyone or anything. She hid what felt like her vulnerable soft underbelly behind a veneer of callousness and in the process closed down her openness and receptivity.

As an Eight contacts the defensiveness behind her pride and the sense of rejection and neediness that underlie it, it may feel as though her whole world will collapse. She has done everything she can to not experience these "weak" places in her soul and often feels she will not survive if she allows them to emerge. As she lets herself contact her neediness and pain, her heart can open again and her soul can become permeable. She can be touched once again, and as she contacts reality with less and less of a thick and defended skin, she will gradually feel more connected with life. Instead of trying to wrestle life for what she needs, she will find her soul relaxing, melting and merging with her essential nature, whose honeylike nectar fills her soul in the form of Merging Gold. Instead of fighting with reality, she will be united with it; and as she progressively surrenders more and more fully to his Being, she will find fulfilment and loving union rather than the capitulation she had feared.


The Wings of Enneatype Eight
Here, the need to be all right of Ego-Planning (Seven) meets the inner deadness of Ego-Indolence (Nine). The result is Ennea-type Eight's characteristic denial of anything that smacks of weakness and deficiency within himself. The utopian plans and dreams of Seven meet the inertia of Nine, resulting in the Eight's characteristic prejudice toward whatever he encounters - he sees what he wants to see, in other words, in a very entrenched sort of way. Also, with his vision of how things could be, coming from Seven, and his external focus, coming from Nine, he demands that things conform to the way he thinks they ought to be, wanting all wrongs he sees to be righted.

From another angle, the Seven's hunger for stimulation plus the deadness to the essential realm of Nine leads to the Eight's lust for material gratifications and his focus on sensory satisfactions.