The Self Preservation Instinct Thread

[Daeva]

Do you have any questions or thoughts on the Self Preservation instinct?
Do you wonder what it is all about?
How Self Preservational are you?
How does the instinct combine with type?
How does it combine with the other instincts?
What does it mean to be Self Preservation dominant, aux, or blind?
Did anything profound happen to you that reminded you of the Self Preservation instinct?

This is the thread for it! Any thoughts and arguments on the instinct are welcome!

[Daeva]

I have a been mulling over the Self Pres instinct for a while now and I've been having an exceedingly difficult time separating what is the Sp instinct from what is type 5 influence. For example: when it comes to the tendency for pulling up walls and boundaries, where does Self Pres differ from the type 5's retention of the self?

Volcana Thana Arya RALA SpaceCadet

[a2jc4life]

I have the same problem separating it from type 8's practical, "get it done" nature & self-reliance. Put the 8 and 5 together it's a double whammy. lol

[ledyanoy]

Daeva

[Daeva]

ledyanoy

Don't put too much weight on my calling it the "aux" (yes, for auxiliary). I merely meant it to indicate the position in the write-out of the stack, not as an indication of the actual value of the instinct.

[ledyanoy]

Daeva, Okay ?

[SpiritoftheGael]

Daeva This is a really hard question for me given the fact that I have sp 5. I'm going to have to think about it a bit. I do some thing that I guess would be more stereo-typically SP and not necessarily 5, like having my concealed carry license and going down to the range to practice with my hand gun for self protection. There's other things as well like the fact that I've always saved money, ever since I was a little kid, which also leaves me feeling more independent, hence I can rely less on others which gives me a stronger boundary. I wouldn't necessarily classify either of those things as five, although a five could do them.

[ledyanoy]

[Mahat]

ledyanoy

[ledyanoy]

Thanaexactly

[ledyanoy]

[patrick]

I relate to being sp dominant partly as a preoccupation with a feeling that, if I were to put it to words, would be something like "I don't have to put up with this" or "I'm not sure if I need/want/care about this enough for this to be worth it." And when I'm in the habit of thinking consciously about that feeling, I generally see how self-defeating it is, but as just a feeling it leads to situations where suddenly realize I haven't talked to someone I've been meaning to keep up with for over a month. It's more like an absence of social energy than it is about putting up walls. Like when I've been really close to a group of people and underwent a relatively brief period of stress (short enough that I still maintain my connections), I sometimes found myself just mindlessly echoing the sentiments, thoughts, and actions of my group.

[Vive]

I consider myself SP dominant. I think the most essential aspect of it is it's focus on the self and the needs of the self and making sure these are satisfied. Like ledyanoy has said, i think it is not so much not feeling capable to deal with the world or the classical avarice of not wanting to give of what you perceive you already have so little of.

As patrick mentioned here, I have the idea it's more about boundaries (e.g. 'I don't want to put up with this') and an occupation with your own needs and the self in general (Do I care about this, is it worth it for me?'). If I'm reading too much into what you are saying, patrick, please tell me. I am conflict-averse in a certain sense (but not afraid of it) and when it comes to dealing with other people I am generally a big softie, if am to be very honest. I do my best to keep other people into account and think about their needs. However, if somebody oversteps my boundaries it will draw out an immediate response, not per se externally, but at the least internally. Small sidenote: When I was younger I already had a good sense of my boundaries, but it was hard to properly communicate them. I had a bully in childhood who overstepped all my boundaries, I was very vocal about not liking it, but it still didn't mean the bullying stopped or that the person stopped overstepping my boundaries. Even if you're SP-focused it still doesn't mean you're good at asserting those boundaries or asserting yourself.

When I perceive people are abusing my skills or taking advantage of me I will very quickly step up and inform them what I think of that. I often wonder what I get out of something and if I don't feel my needs are met I will again tell others about that. Even when I suffer guilt and lower self-esteem I will still not allow you to overstep my boundaries. A more negative part of my personality that results from this is that I can be very good at complaining. I will tell you what I don't like and what I don't want. As long as nobody oversteps or invalidates these boundaries I will remain a big softie. My SP 9w8 sister is very different from me, but reacts in a similar fashion to crossed boundaries. She is very nice, chill and relaxed until you overstep the boundaries, even while she deeply fears conflict.

I've had to learn to develop a focus on other people needs. By my nature, I am very focused on myself. In my specific case, this focus includes a lot of perfectionism and high standards given to myself. I put a lot of pressure on myself to achieve what I want and get where I want. Thanks to my SP nature, I suppose, my high standards mostly pertain to myself and mostly burden me. I like freely giving things to people and doing things for people, as long as it doesn't make me feel burdened. I love other people and interacting with them, but I just really hate it when they don't take me into account.

[Animal]

Maybe Sp/So. I hadnt seen this post until now...

[Vive]

And the plot thickens XD. Perhaps this is just more Ti's orientation towards independence and consistency. This post was also made before my typing here, and you telling me about how you saw six. In this post I thought about type one, and specifically what I related to was SP 1. Type one didn't really make sense to me if I wasn't SP, which now that I think of it is probably a good sign I'm mostly likely not a one.

I'm starting to think you were problably right about So/Sx, it fits much more with observations close friends have made about my outward focus. My perspective on myself tends to shift naturally anyways, so until I have a good grasp on myself I think observations made by close friends and others tend to be more reliable. People tell me I am much more agreeable and much more easy going than I think I am /present myself to be initially.

[Animal]

Cool, makes sense . So/Sx was my first guess and it seems really right.

[Princess of Hearts]

I don't know where SP is in my stacking, but the way I experience it is, I have a strong sense of what I have and of what I need, and I tend to say goodbye very easily to people if I perceive myself as already having more than what they are offering or if being around them costs me too much.
I find it difficult to feel desperate and like I 'really need' someone, in theory I feel it very easily, but once I'm in a real situation it very quickly turns into "Bye, I'm going back to my castle, your loss"
Even when it's not really their loss, I'm just being a lunatic
Even with romantic interests I was entirely in love and obsessed with, I'd get to a point where I'd just withhold myself from them, I didn't want anything to be done on my expense.
And everything felt like it was solely my expense, down to them breathing.


But I am talking about the currency here being social or emotional, not any concrete things I could give or actions I could take, though what's behind those things and actions can matter, I am not naturally in tune with 'things and actions' and can be very generous with money, time, energy etc. because they mean nothing to me, there's an abundance of them in the world. But once I feel myself getting humiliated I very quickly start to withdraw it all, I'm not playing a fool in anyone's story.
So it has a lot to do with 'putting up walls', I relate to that part of SP.

What I don't relate to is being money and security driven, I also don't have an explicit self-focus on my boundaries, I'm more people-focused and I don't automatically draw lines. For me relationships are too complex for that and I'm constantly in a bit of a flux, as Atelier put it, I'm very dependant on nuances of the interaction itself, that's where my focus goes.
But at the same time, my SP shows in my behaviors that come instinctively, like my rigidity and my sense of always having something that's mine that I can fall back on and deep down feeling like I don't need more, there's a sense of distance from most things despite not feeling emotionally distant.

Then there's also literal focus on my body, foods I want or don't want to eat, automatically knowing something is gonna hurt, that something is very inconvenient, my fears and my phobias, etc. , I compromise on some things because I don't wanna be rude or constantly causing a fuss and looking crazy.
I have social anxiety and one part of it is feeling like people simply won't care about this part of me and it's something I can't help but care about, yet still I don't manage that fear directly but through my relationships to people or unconsciously my appearance (say, if I'm pretty enough then looking crazy might actually be endearing and sexy and if I'm ugly it can't be anything but crazy), but this entire focus feels secondary despite it playing a big role, I am not constantly consciously tuned into it.


I don't know where my SP is, make of this what you will.

[[redacted]]

I experience Self-pres in a fairly straightforward manner, in that I have a low tolerance for physical discomfort and pain and will try to avoid it as much as possible. And in general I'm just very...focused on myself. The idea of "I am my body" sounds cringe-y, but I suppose that's what it means, to be primarily tuned into yourself and your resources, be they more tangible or psychological. What's in it for me? =P

I have been compared to the Princess on the Pea before, though at the same time I'm also quite a mess for someone who can be so squeamish.

[[redacted]]

Another thing I associate with being self-pres is how I prefer to feel like a separate unit, as I've mentioned elsewhere... Not talking about being literally isolated, I can be but I do enjoy the stimuli of interacting with someone else so it varies. But at the end of the day I'm still on my own. I mean it just seems obvious to me, but apparently some experience it differently, like a lingering sense of connection. Or something, I don't know if I understand it.

Although I can have a desire to possess someone... But it's one-sided because the other way around makes me uneasy. And this sort of possessiveness might be Sp-ish in itself, like the person is "mine" rather than it being about "us" (it honestly feels strange to me to think in terms of us or we). And once someone is mine I can do what I want with them... I mean, not literally, but... When I realize that's not how it works it is confusing and frustrating.